It’s normal to feel a certain amount of fear, especially around things that are important to us.
But what happens when we’re completely stuck in our fears? When they’re swirling around in our heads and we can’t move past them?
This is a really helpful exercise you can do called “Fear Setting”.
I recorded this video on Facebook Live yesterday on my regular afternoon walk, near where I live on Hampstead Heath. [I’m facing my fears creating a video every day!]
Try this exercise to move past fear to achieve your goals!
Posted by Ask IAN on Thursday, March 15, 2018
The 3 steps to Fear Setting. [Video summary.]
Start by thinking about a fear you’re grappling with. For example, you may be considering leaving your full time work and starting your own business.
1. Grab a notebook or paper and create 3 columns with the headings Define, Prevent, Repair.
In the first column, ‘Define” your fears. Write down 10, 20, 50 of them! Get them all out of your head e.g. “I’m afraid of losing a regular salary”.
In the 2nd column, write down what you could do to ‘Prevent’ this. Could you go part time for a while? Reduce your hours as you start to generate revenue from your new business? Do some consulting work on the side? Take a sabbatical from your regular job, and gently test the waters? Think of all the ways you could prevent the worst case scenarios you defined in column 1.
And in the 3rd column, write down what you could do to ‘Repair’ the damage if it all goes wrong e.g. you could go back to full time work. More often than not, you’ll find that the worst case scenario isn’t as bad as you’re fearing, especially if you do the work to prevent it from happening in the first place.
2. When you’ve done this, look at what a partial win might look like. What if it’s not the huge success you’d hoped, but there is some partial success. What might that include? For instance, if you start your new business, you might develop new sales and marketing skills. These are valuable skills you can apply in other work, so they’re at least a partial win. What else might you learn and experience? How else might you grow?
3. Finally, ask yourself, what will it cost me if I don’t take action? This is a biggy. It might be confronting. We live our lives as if we have all the time in the world. But how much time do we have? Who knows? Ask yourself, where will I be in 3, 6, or 9 months from now if I don’t take action? Financially, emotionally, physically… Write down the answers.
This is such a powerful exercise, especially when you realise that the downside is often not as bad as you might think. And the upside could be better than you possibly imagined, if you get past your fears and take action.
I’d love you to join my brand new Facebook page, “Ask IAN”. IAN is an acronym for Intention, Attention, No Tension. It’s a super simple tool i developed to use when you’re looking for structure or support, especially when you’re feeling stressed or overwhelmed. The FB group is a place to explore and develop your wellness.